Things I have learned recently.

August 5, 2008

THING ONE:

If you need to know the approximate yardage of something – a piece of fabric, for example, or a big-ass banner – you can do the following.

  1. Hold the edges of the thing that you need to measure in your hands – one end in the left, one in the right.
  2. Turn your head to the right.
  3. Extend your left arm.
  4. The length between your left hand and the tip of your nose (which, recall, is turned to the right) – that’s a yard.

How magical and domestic-goddess-like is that shit?

THING TWO:

Speaking of fabric – if, for some reason, you ever buy it, or whatever, and you need to know how much is left on a bolt – ’cause you’re a domestic goddess and you’re going to reupholster some chairs or make pillows or whatever – two wraps on the bolt is approximately one yard.

THING THREE:

I will never be a domestic goddess.

-mym

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