A letter to a feminist.

October 22, 2008

Dear lady,

You come in here and act like the fact that there is no coffee – in this moment, and only in this moment – is a great crime against nature.  And you.  But you know what?  I’m busy.  I just returned from lunch, it’s my birthday, back up.  And don’t use that tone.  You’ll be back in five minutes?  That’s great – that doesn’t mean there will be coffee for you by that time.  I will not end my phone call more rapidly because you want coffee.  I will not interrupt the eight other things I have to complete because you want coffee.  Hey, here’s an idea – you want some coffee?  How about make some coffee.

You know, I like you, and all, but you’re acting like an old boy from the fifties.  Take a deep breath and ask nicely.  I’ll be way more inclined to make you a pot of coffee if you don’t act like it’s your god-given right.

I'm not dicking around with you, either.

Love, Yvanka


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